Are You Going to Fail?

Most of us have dreams, aspirations, goals. Whether you dream to one day live in a certain city, or work at a certain company; make a certain amount of money, or retire by a certain age; or your current ambition is to earn a certain award, stop an addiction, or live out more gratitude in your life – there’s always a chance that you are going to fail.

Statistics show that 50% of first marriages end in divorce. That means that half of the people with a goal of succeeding at marriage, will fail.

Nearly 50% of students seeking a college degree drop out before they obtain it.

A whopping 56% of Americans want to lose weight according to a gallup poll, yet 30% of Americans remain obese. We all know from talking to people (or perhaps trying ourselves) that many people fail to lose the weight that they set out to lose.

Out of the thousands of small businesses that are started each year in the United States, 96% of them will fail by the 10-year mark. Ouch!

Wouldn’t it be nice to know in advance whether or not you’re going to fail?

I can’t tell you for certain whether you will succeed or not; however, I can assure you that if you cannot answer with an affirmative the following three questions, then you most likely will fail at whatever you are attempting to achieve.

Answering these 3 questions will help you predict your failure rate:

1. Do I Believe That I Can Succeed?

This isn’t a question to gloss over and just say what you think others want to hear. This is the time to look deep within and ask yourself, “Do I truly believe that I can succeed in this endeavor? Do I think I am going to stick with it through thick and thin until I reach my goal?”

I’m not talking about whether or not you know every single step to take from start to finish. Nor am I saying that you think that you’ve got it all together and are delusional enough to think that you won’t make a few mistakes along the way. But our self-talk and personal belief systems have an enormous impact on our final outcomes. That being said, deep down, are you expecting to meet your goal and ultimately have success?

If the answer is ‘no’, then you have a very high likelihood of failing.

2. Do I Require the Support and Affirmation From Those Around Me?

This may hurt, but someone has to be real with you: If you expect your best friend, your coworker, your spouse, or even your Mama to support you in your goal or dream, then you, my friend, are going to fail.

Your goal is just that. Your goal. It’s not their goal. You need to take full responsibility for it and own it, no matter what anyone else says. No matter who praises you or criticizes you. When your mom is jealous of your weightloss because she’s been trying for years with no success; when your coworker resents you for having the guts to go after that promotion that he’s always wished he could get; or when your spouse is apathetic about your dream and doesn’t celebrate your wins alongside you – it’s going to hurt. Are you OK with that?

You may have a cheerleader or two, but most likely, you will encounter at least someone that you will want a high five from that offers a middle finger instead. Are you OK with that?

If the answer is ‘no’, then you have a very high likelihood of failing.

3. Do I have a plan in place to avoid the pitfalls that have caused me to fail in the past?

Each of us have strengths and weaknesses. If you don’t know what yours are, I suggest you discover them. Quickly.

One way to unearth our weaknesses is to identify the times that we’ve failed or struggled in the past, and determine what the specific actions, or inaction, were that took place on our part that led to the failure.

For instance, if you can’t hold a job, why have you been let go? Let’s say it’s because you’ve been late to work too many times. What has caused you to be late? Ok, you slept through your alarm. Why are you sleeping through your alarm? You stay up too late working on reports and projects that were due that next day because you waited until the last minute to get them done. Therefore, your weakness is procrastination.

If your goal is to keep this new job that you just landed, you must have a strategic plan in place that help you to avoid that pitfall of procrastination.

Have you identified your weaknesses that have led to failure in your past, and do you have a plan in place to help you avoid those pitfalls for your current goal?

If the answer is ‘no’, then you high a very high likelihood of failing.

What Should I do if I realize I’m headed for failure?

First, you must become secure in your identity and kill your self-limiting beliefs. Then create a solid plan that helps to ensure success.

The problem is that it is easier said than done – especially if you’re trying to go about it alone.

A simple solution? Hire someone to coach alongside you in order to reach your goals.

The youngest Olympic gold medalist (and current youngest World Champion in American wrestling history), Kyle Snyder, spoke at a conference that I recently attended. Alongside him, was his Ohio State wrestling coach, Tom Ryan, who also shared insight that impacted the entire audience. Kyle told us how he couldn’t have achieved that Olympic gold medal on his own, without Coach Ryan.

He was physically capable, but it took his coach to help guide him, keep him accountable, and draw out of him the capabilities that were inside so that he could succeed and not fail when it came to that gold medal.

What about you? Do you have dreams and goals that you’d like to attain? Maybe they’re smaller, personal goals, or, perhaps you have a passion that you’d like to live out. If you’re interested in improving your success rate in any part of life, feel free to fill out this form to learn more about enrichment coaching with me, and whether or not it’s a right fit to help you achieve success!

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